pre wedding depression

Pre-Wedding Depression: Family Issues

One of the most prominent components of pre-wedding depression can be found in almost all Indian soap-operas and many, many films: Family issues. They get the most coverage because they involve the most amount of characters, and the interaction between characters is what creates, but this is not a soap-opera that needs exaggeration. This is your wedding, and more importantly, your life. So, if you’re wondering about why you are exhibiting intensive symptoms of depression before your wedding, then family issues might just be the most obvious cause.

There are obviously two families that you need to be worried about – the one you’re born in, and the one you’re going to be a part of. These two are distinct from the one you will now create – i.e. your own family. For some people, new beginnings aren’t a big deal – they take them in stride and even look forward to changing. However, for many, separation can be a big problem. The family they grew up with has too many memories associated with it – a huge comfort zone, a bubble is bursting.

family issues

New families mean new social dynamics. Adjusting to the idiosyncrasies, likes, and whims of a whole new set of people can be very daunting. There’re many ways you might be thinking about this – but very few of those ways are actually healthy ways of dealing with the situation. For example, if you go about trying to please everybody from the new family, you might end up being privy to, or doing things that are not according to your ethics, or habits. You stop being yourself and keep feeling caged. These pent-up feelings can be your downfall, and may not simply surface right off the bat.

On the other hand, outright hostility and turning up your nose at your spouse’s family may create a rift between you and the people you’re probably going to have to deal with for a while. This may lead to an unhealthy marriage from the get-go and will consume a lot of your energy that you’d rather devote to nurturing your future family. The best solution here is to dramatically improve the communication methods between you and your spouse. If you become a dynamic, inseparable team that shares interests, goals and has a collective vision for the future, then you will put out an aura of harmony that will help you against any family-oriented obstacle.

Evert girl have Pre-Wedding Depression before her marriage.

family oriented obstacles

Set your expectations and your boundaries so that everyone involved directly or indirectly gets a clear, non-mixed message. For this, both individual and couples counseling can be employed. Couples counseling works best if you and your partner already have that synchronicity, while individual counseling will definitely be needed if you and your spouse are on totally different pages when it comes to dealing with family issues. You can get lonely and will need a vent if you think all these burdens are yours to bear alone. A new family, despite its issues and problems, needn’t be poison – or a minefield waiting to blow up. It can be a new safe haven, and an addition to your ever-increasing support system once you’ve learned how to cope with it.  

About the Author


Monica is a moniker for our relationship expert. She's been working as a relationship counselor for over 10 years, and over time, has sharpened her personality. Unlike typical counselors, Monica is not afraid to use a harsher method to resolve certain issues that demand it. Even if she's a virtual entity now, she can still see into your soul.

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